Holly

So many common symbols of the season have their roots deep in our collective history. Rather than launch a diatribe on how the Christians stole Solstice, or urgings to put the "Sol" back in Solstice and the fire back in the Yule Log, or exhortations to put "Christ" back in "Christmas" I am writing here to highlight the traditions we share in the common spirit of the season - we are all celebrating some very sacred, spiritual aspects of life, regardless of our affiliation; and also as an hommage to the ancient ancestors who, in their connection to Mother Earth and the cycle of life and the seasons, gave us these symbols and traditions. This little series is by no means academic; I'm reaching deep into the recesses of my lately-rather-shabby memory in a spirit of, well - fun. This is not intended to disrespect any belief system. I enjoy history and looking at the origins of traditions - that's all. (Also, I'm a self-professed nerd, trapped in the house with some sort of plague-like illness [just a cold? Pssht!] with two other sick people, one of them a Little, and my husband who, to hear him tell it, is likely terminally ill. I need some amusement and mind-sharpening.)

First up: holly. It's a sacred plant in many traditions.

Holly has been symbolic of fertility and everlasting life. There are a few basic traditions that I can think of: that of the Romans and Saturnalia, and the pagan traditions (and by that I'm thinking of the basic Norse and Celtic myths), and the more recent Christian ones.


The Romans paid respect to the god Saturn at this time of year. They feasted and made very merry for about a week, ending around 23 December (which is interesting to note, because the Solstice can fall, I think, anywhere between 20 and 23 December, depending on the year). Holly was the sacred plant associated with Saturn, and was a common gift to the god and to one another.


Then you have the Holly King and Oak King. The Kings may be specific to the Norse traditions, though I can't be sure. The Oak King symbolizes the new year and rules from mid-winter (winter Solstice) to midsummer (summer Solstice). The Holly King rules from midsummer to mid-winter and is symbolic of winter. At Yule-time and midsummer, the Kings struggle for the favour of the Goddess. At Yule, the Oak King kills the Holly King (I believe by cutting of his head) or sends him away, at the least, and with this victory brings or is symbolic of light and growth.


There are so many symbols for and links back to each of the Kings. The Kings struggling twice a year might seem a little airy-fairy, I'm sure, but there's also an Irish fable of the robin redbreast (Oak King) finding the wren (Holly King) in either a holly bush or an ivy bush, and killing the wren -- or the new year succeeding the old.


The Holly King was symbolic of winter. What happens at midsummer, after all? Days shorten, darkness begins to rule in a literal sense, the weather turns colder day by day, crops are harvested after that point and vegetation and many animals go to rest.


The Kings are either twins who struggle, or perhaps the same person, reborn cyclically in a new form to rule the seasons. I believe the sabbats of the year are associated with the king's lifecycle. Some traditions hold that his marriage at midsummer to the Goddess is consummated so fully that it results in his death (imagine that wedding night! Yikes). At Samhain (Halloween), he awaits rebirth via the Goddess - and part of the Yule tradition is the birth of the Child of Promise (who, I believe, then becomes the Oak King - or is *like* the Oak King in that he brings new year and light).

It may seem odd, but the Holly King is believed to be an antecedent to Santa Claus. That's a topic for another post, though!

In most Christian traditions, holly was believed to be very powerful, with magickal powers. It was hung on entryways to homes, to ward off evil spirits and witches... Who usually roam in the darkness, or are considered "dark", hmm? It's also taken as symbolic of Christ's crown of thorns, and the berries, of the blood shed in redemption. The carol "The Holly and the Ivy" is heavy with Christian symbolism - the white flower for the Virgin Mary, the red berry for the blood Christ shed, the thorn and so on.

So it's all very confusing. It would be difficult for one tradition to claim it as their own. There are many traditions that hold holly as sacred and/or powerfully symbolic, from the Romans, the Norse, Druids and Christians, and likely many others. It's a beautiful, sacred plant. It's a little sad that as a natural species, it's now becoming rare in many areas. Maybe symbolic of our losing touch with our origins, too?

Seasonal Musings: I

The Grinch

Tony Blair

Tony Blair

The Grinch

A Different Sort of Remembrance Day

Two years. A year seems like a long time, until you count your grief in years.

We were just married and so, so hopeful for you; so excited. You were so wanted. It was over far too quickly and cruelly. I think of you often, especially now: we've come full circle. Vacillating from absolute, complete darkness to hope, dealing with the worst of human nature and finding the best.

You were loved, very, very much, and still are. You helped your father and I learn what and who really matters, and you gave the two of us so much more understanding and love for one another. We would never have come to that if it hadn't been for you. I'm so sorry your little life was so brief, but it did make an impact on us, all for the better, even though losing you has been the worst thing that ever happened to me. I just can't imagine that your presence was without a point or value; I believe it was very valuable, but it took me a long time to understand and accept how. And be grateful for the worst, and one of the best, things that ever happened to us.

We still miss who you might have been, maybe even more so now that we've had a wonderful eight months with Leah. Your sister is beautiful and makes us glow. I wouldn't have traded you for anything, but I'm grateful to you for starting us on our path to Leah. Losing you is still the worst thing that's ever happened to us. I still remember, so clearly, waking up that morning and feeling peaceful and glowing at the thought of what your Daddy and I had made, a calm joy at what the coming months and years would bring. And then later that day, the horror of what was happening. I still feel that horror. It was meant to be this way, but I'm still so sorry I couldn't do right by you. I only hope that the way we live our lives now is a testament to how you touched us.

We love you.

Super cool giveaway!

Check out this giveaway for a package of Canadian-made pocket diapers! It sounds like a fabulous company. Their colours are pretty, with a fair price point. No bogus lines about the Canadian government "unfairly taxing" diapers that are made outside of North America, either...

I hope we get to try these sometime soon, once The Horrible Rash is cleared up!

Cheering Myself Up

Leah is eight months old, strong and healthy and funny.

She has a beautiful smile, my eyes and a wonky spot on her ear that she got from me, too.

Leah knows her name now.

She's learning to clap her hands and is doing so to some songs on "Sesame Street" as I write this. She loves the Will.I.Am song... "Oh, I'mma keep my head up high, Keep on reachin' high, Never gonna quit, Just keep gettin' stronger..."

Leah loves her Exersaucer, and jumps so energetically that sometimes I think she'll bring down the house. She babbles and has a magnificent laugh.

She is getting ready to crawl, but in the meantime, she gets where she needs to go by bouncing on her bum and digging in her heels to propel herself forward. She did that to reach the ragdoll I made for her that was on the edge of the couch.

My husband is happy at work. We have a beautiful home, lots of good food to eat and we are warm. Our car had the sensibility to breakdown while we were still at our hotel on Sunday, and not while we were in the middle of nowhere on the 401.

And now, I'm going to go out and see how many people in weird outfits I can find.

There. I feel pretty good now.

This is Leah's rag doll. I'll be making more for an upcoming craft sale. I love sewing. :)

15 October

From the 109th Congress in the U.S., H. Con. Res. 222, passed 25 July, 2007:

Whereas each year, approximately one million pregnancies in the United States end in miscarriage, stillbirth, or the death of a newborn baby;

Whereas it is a great tragedy to lose the life of a child;

Whereas babies sometimes live within or outside their mothers' wombs for only a short period of time;

Whereas even the shortest lives are still valuable, and the grief of those who mourn the loss of these lives should not be trivialized;

Whereas during the past two years, Governors of all 50 States have signed proclamations designating October 15 as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day;

Whereas the legislatures of the States of Arkansas, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Missouri, New York, Rhode Island, and South Dakota have passed concurrent resolutions recognizing October 15 of each year, as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day;

Whereas the observance of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day may provide validation to those who have lost a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth, or other complications;

Whereas recognizing Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day will provide the people of the United States with an opportunity to increase their understanding of the great tragedy involved in the deaths of unborn and newborn babies;

Whereas Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day would enable the people of the United States to consider how, as individuals and communities, they can meet the needs of bereaved mothers, fathers, and family members, and work to prevent the causes of these deaths; and

Whereas October 15, 2005 would be an appropriate day to observe National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day: Now, therefore, be it

Resolved by the House of Representatives (the Senate concurring), That the Congress--

(1) supports the goals and ideals of National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day;

and

(2) requests that the President issue a proclamation calling upon the people of the United States to observe such day with appropriate programs and activities.

Canadians in Ontario, please visit Perinatal Bereavement Services of Ontario for information about their campaign to have 15 October recognized as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day in Ontario.

Please take a moment at 7 p.m. in your time zone on the evening of 15 October and light a candle for one hour. The goal is to have a wave of light passing through, to mark for just a short time the lives of such tiny beings who touched so many people very deeply.

Stored up rants

Apparently this has caused quite a furore among the more rabid lactivists. Apparently a onesie that could be a reference to racecar technology is being taken as a subversive plot to - gasp! - promote something other than breastfeeding. Which of course, if you'll remember, everyone can do, and if you can't - well, you just didn't try hard enough. The onesie is a conspiracy, a promotion tool for formula companies that will outright stop people from breastfeeding... Because they want their baby to look cool in an Old Navy onesie.

Some are even calling for a boycott of Old Navy.

Pause, for a moment, and ponder that no one is calling for a boycott on the basis that this onesie was likely made in a sweatshop on the labour of kiddies (who may or may not have been breastfed).

Funny that I don't see anyone complaining about the sexualization of young children with "Boob Man" slogans on onesies. No, that's funny and acceptable, and readily available.

I wonder if they get this steamed about bottle-shaped "Baby on Board" signs for cars?

No. For the most part, the minivan folks with those signs in the window use it as an excuse to drive like even bigger jerks. I guess they have boycotts to get to.

Tell me, does logic seep out when one breastfeeds? No?

Anyway, we all know that breastfeeding is better in the short- and longer-term, but I am so finished with the aggressive, judgemental mommies whose comments regarding formula-feeding sometimes border on abusive and are at minimum often passive-aggressive. I can only hope they are teaching their children better than to judge and abuse others without understanding the many shades that contribute to a choice.

Make a new bandwagon. Instead of slagging people for formula feeding, and complaining about Old Navy's logos, why don't you use this energy to start lobbying for coverage of lactation consultants and breastfeeding education and support under private and public insurance plans? Breastfeeding can help prevent many common health concerns - most of which are huge burdens on our public healthcare. So, help a momma out - help get all of us the tools that many women cannot afford, in order to make more women successful at breastfeeding.

We like cloth diapers at our house. It's been six months since we bought disposables. I have part of a packet left that are hilariously tiny... Hilarious, but they do make me sad, with their tininess.

And to be clear, we like cloth diapers for a few reasons:

1. We never run out of diapers. We're conscious of how many clean ones we have left, in a way that we were not conscious of the diaper stock when we were blindly grabbing a 'sposie from a package during Leah's first four weeks or so.
2. They are cheaper than 'sposies. Our initial stash cost about $250. We've since spent a little more on nighttime diapers. A week's supply of diapers for us was running at least $20. You do the math. You're all set, if you can limit yourself to your initial stash and not keep getting pulled in by the cuteness.
3. Leah has never had a diaper rash (knock wood).
4. Leah does not smell like pee in her cloth diapers.
5. We're not buying something just to throw it away and add to the massive piles of garbage upon which we'll all tread and build our homes before too long.

These are, however, not for everyone.

Anyway, Cotton Babies, makers of BumGenius, Flip (our favourites) and Econobum have come out with new prints on their 4.0 and all-in-one versions. There was a lot of hype about the "reveal" and I was initially disappointed that I wouldn't be able to get Flip covers in the allegedly fun new prints.

Then I saw the prints. And their video reveal.

A few thoughts...

First, the prints are ugly. There's no way around it. I don't even know what the heck the print is even of. (If you can see it, please do share.) There appear to be semi-identifiable eyes throughout the prints (which I find slightly more disturbing than birds). And they all look the same to me. The colours are just... Anyway.

They have named each "design": Concrete Jungle, Jet Setter, Free Spirit, Retail Therapy and Eiffel Tower. The "collection" is called Tiny Socialite.

At this point the stream of consciousness is nearly exploding in my head.

Clearly, they are marketing this to the yummy-mummy yuppie types who are, I suppose, increasingly purchasing BumGenius products in tony baby boutiques in hip neighbourhoods. That's all I can fathom, based on the names of these things. And the fact that Cotton Babies refers to this as a "collection". I know Cotton Babies wants to make money, but this has kind of taken the whole point of cloth diapers - as a way to be more self-reliant rather than consumer-driven - to a different level.

The artist is likely not a mother. Really, you want to make diapering more exciting? I can't get exicted about poo, no matter what it's wrapped up in. Fail.

You imagined or used as your muses jet-setting, disco babies with little "fros"? Tiny socialites, you say? All I can picture is some sort of baby-esque Real Housewives scenario. Famous for having money and doing nothing. Or not having money, as it were. That, or an airport scene from a Jackie Collins book, with rich babies and their LV luggage...

This is almost as bad as the Huggies jean-print diaper commercials.

Now, this is a bull, so here's a really cute baby. And some horses. And the milkhouse at Mom and Dad's.